I will start this post by promising that it won’t be a sad one like my last one. In fact, my last post will be the one and only truly sad one in my entire blog…at least up until now. I can’t predict the future after all (insert winky face here).

I took my time away to heal. I gave myself the appropriate amount of time before I got “back on the horse”. I had to eventually move on and start living again.

That was when I decided to go back to online dating. Now, I think I might have mentioned this in a previous post, but I can’t quite remember so I will say it again. Sorry if it’s redundant. I sometimes had what I referred to as a G-rated profile, and then what I referred to as an R-rated one on the dating site that I would go on.

This time, I needed to get back on the horse a bit slowly, so I went with the G-rated profile. What is the difference, you ask? The G-rated one is the one I put up when I am just looking for a relationship with someone. That’s the end goal. The R-rated one is the one I put up when I am seeking a Dom/sub relationship.

Now, my ideal relationship would be to have both mixed together. I’ve experienced that and I love it.

Getting back to my dating profile. When I create my G-rated profile, men tend to view me as this innocent, vanilla girl-next-door type. I understand why they think that. I am very girly looking, dress well, and take care of myself, both body-wise and hygienically. If people see me out and about, I’m never the girl wearing sweatpants or God forbid, pajama pants. NEVER!

Now you’re thinking I’m some high maintenance girl. I’m not that either. I’m somewhere in between. I’d describe myself as a laid-back sassy girl with a good sense of humour. There, now that that’s out of the way…

Here’s another curve ball I’m going to throw at you. I had a woman contact me on my new G-rated profile. She was attractive and very complimentary towards me. I realized that I was turned on by our conversation. It was a brief one because I am pretty sure she was just a catfish, but none the less, it got me thinking.

Did I want to pursue a woman as well? I had to admit I had thought about it here and there throughout the years. I am not a lesbian…I like men, that I know, but the curiosity of being with a woman was definitely there. That woman unknowingly yanked that to the front of my mind.

So I created a second profile on this dating site, one that seeked a woman. I found out that women are a tad different on dating sites. They don’t seem to like to start the conversation. However, they also didn’t know what I looked like because I didn’t put any pictures of myself up on this particular profile.

I did end up chatting with a few women though. Most of the conversations didn’t go anywhere in the end. There was one however. She and I ended up switching over to texting off the site.

We got along very well and flirted quite heavily. Then she asked me out on a date. I said yes.

We went out for a drink. It was a good time. We talked and joked and just got along really well. We ended the date with just a hug. She ended up telling me afterwards that she had hoped I would have invited her to my place at the end.

We texted a fair amount after that, on a daily basis. We flirted and sexted, even sending not so clothed pictures of ourselves. It was fun and hot. I was nervous to meet up with her again though. I had no idea how to be with a female sexually, and I knew that if I saw her again, that that’s what would have happened.

She attempted to get together with me a few times, but I always made up an excuse not to do so. She had wanted to get together at my place and have a few drinks…and then, well, you know.

She got frustrated with me in the end, and I don’t blame her. I absolutely loved the idea of being with a woman, but when it got close to it, I, for some reason got cold feet. I guess it was the fear of it all. The unknown.

We eventually just lost touch. She was great to talk with but I wasn’t all that attracted to her physically. Maybe that was my issue, or at least part of it.

After that, I decided to take that dating profile down, at least for the time being. I needed to give myself time away from that to think more about if I actually wanted it.

So I focused on my G-rated, male-seeking profile. I will admit, I am picky with the man I choose. There are certain things I look for, and certain deal-breakers. I had my profile very specific in order to weed out the type of men I wasn’t seeking.

I received a message one day, from a man I will call Jeremy. I will tell you all about him in my next post (wink, wink)…